Monday, September 29, 2014

Godly Friendships

1 Samuel 18:1-4; 20:1-42

Life-Lesson:   Jonathan teaches us how to submit to God and how to submit to friends.

Jonathan was one of the best gifts God ever gave to David.  – Keith Kaynor

Prov. 17:17; 18:24

Eccl. 4:9-12

Literature offers us great stories of good friendships: Orry Main and George Hazard (North and South); Anne Shirley and Diana Barry – her “bosom friend” (Anne of Green Gables)

God knew that David needed an intimate friend to walk with him through the valley that was ahead of him.  Intimate friends are rare in life.  There’s something about an intimate friend that causes your souls to be knit together.  It’s what we call a kindred spirit.  – Charles Swindoll

Jonathan’s friendship was one of the few positive things David had to fortify himself for the decade of fugitive living that lay just ahead.  He would need to draw strength from this in the years to come.

A surprising fact:      David was about 19, Jonathan approximately 50, and Saul near 70.

4 Characteristics of a Close Friendship

1.         A close friend is willing to sacrifice.

Ø  He wanted to give something that belonged to him and was meaningful.

Ø  They are not stingy with their possessions.

Ø  You can hardly impose on this kind of friend.

Ø  He doesn’t keep score.

Ø  He is there to assist in whatever way needed.

Ø  Unselfishness prevails.

2.         A close friend is a loyal defense before others.

Ø  Not a fair-weather friend.

Ø  Won’t speak against you when you’re not around.

Ø  He not only defended his friend but rebuked his father for his attitude.

Ø  No pettiness, no envy, no jealousy.

3.         Close friends give each other complete freedom to be themselves.

Ø  When your heart is broken, you can bleed all over a friend like this and he will show understanding.

Ø  He will show compassion.

Ø  He won’t confront you in your misery.

 When a good friend is hurting, let him hurt.  If a good friend feels like weeping,   let him             weep.  If a good friend needs to complain, listen.  An intimate friend doesn’t bale.  You  can be yourself, no matter what that self looks like.

4.         A close friend is a constant source of encouragement.  

Ø  Someone has said, “Loneliness is the most desperate of all English words.”

Ø  Jesus surrounded himself with friends.

Ø  Jonathan sought out his friend.

Ø  He sees David at the lowest moments, frightened and bewildered, and he brings him encouragement. 

Ø  “I understand how that feels.  You have every right to have those feelings.  There’ll be a brighter day some day, but right now I’m here with you, no matter what.”

The friendship of David and Jonathan was a true friendship that transcended the circumstances in which both men found themselves.  It was a wholesome, God-honoring relationship that God used in the lives of both men – and even in the future lives of their families.  – Swindoll

Friendship Matters


1.         Biblical heroes modeled that it is healthy to have a few close friendships that you know     on a deeper level than everyone else.

2.         Some friendship are seasonal – they serve a specific purpose in a specific season – but they are not intended to be for every season.

3.         Friendships will change, and some friends will walk away from you. 

4.         Every friendship experiences disappointment.  To disappoint and be disappointed is to       be human.

5.         Friendship should not be limited by age.  A more important factor is an equal          commitment to God.

6.         Remember the long-range view of friendship.  Situations and abilities change over time.  Jonathan could bless David at first.  Years later, David could help Jonathan’s   family.

7.         Strive to be true friends with your spouse.

8.         Only Jesus will be your most intimate and trusted companion – forever.

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